Toddler talk “mommy, where are your bumpers?”

Just a little more and then it's done with the toddler talk. After all, in a few months the little guy will be a real toddler, will be four years old and going to school. The little man's toddler talk, which I can laugh immensely at from time to time, will then become toddler talk. Which I can probably laugh about just as hard. The toddler becomes a toddler but remains the same funny little boy.

Since little man can talk I keep track of his, sometimes hilarious, often extraordinary statements and slips of the tongue. The other day he asked me where my bumpers are. Euh…

Toddler Talk

I love it, those funny slips, delightful logic or real think-throughs. Anyone who has or knows small children will have heard them before. Every parent has some anecdotes about funny conversations with the kids. So my mother, (sorry mom) used to call a stool a ‘pussy’.

Pardon my french. I called a convertible, a ‘car with an open roof’. And do you hear many a child say they can ride a bike ‘with loose hands’. Do you know them too? Your funniest slips as a child?

Our little man can do it too.

Geography and Physics

Before bedtime the toddler and I always have a little ritual. Reading a book, singing a song and chatting for a while. Like any toddler, he tries to drag out the moment of sleep as long as possible.

Then, when I want to get up to leave, the toddler has some pressing questions. Usually these are complicated questions and I have to dig very hard for my knowledge of geography or physics. ‘Where is the sun when the moon is there?’, ‘Where does lightning come from?’, ‘How does the lava come out of the volcano?’ You understand that I cannot get rid of that easily and secretly I think he knows that too. Tasty lines before bed.

Mommy, where are your bumpers?

The other day we had such a talk before going to bed. This time he wondered why we have eyebrows. There was some poking in my eyes and I mentioned eyelashes and eyebrows.

I pointed to his eyebrows, he briefly felt the hairs on his eyes and asked what they were then. So I bravely told him those are his eyelashes. There was some poking in my eyes and picking at my eyebrows again. (Ideally, it saved me from having to fiddle with tweezers again.) He let it all sink in and after a doubtful look, he asked; “Mommy, where are your bumpers?” Euh… I looked down a bit. No, I didn't think he meant that one.

And what an extraordinary turn of hair to bumpers. Then the light bulb went on; ‘aha! He means my eyelashes!’Of course I laughed out loud and then bravely pointed to my own eyelashes. I have to hand it to him that I thought it was a delightful slip of the tongue. He was self-conscious.

I gave him a kiss and soon after he fell into a deep sleep.

What were your best mumbles as a child? And from your child(ren)?

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